OPENING LESSON: "You can make three terrible shots in a row and one great shot and still make par."--From the Film The Legend of Bagger Vance
Well, I have finally won the famous end of the year Jamestown Classic Race in Rhode Island. A large racing venue for the North East and a great course!
I went from dead last for 95% of the race to winning the sprint with a throw at the line. (Robbie Mcewin eat your heart out;)
As many of you know, I've had some back luck and missed opportunities at this event. Most of you also know, that I'm not a big racer, but like many of us--I race to challenge myself and offer some focus to my training.
I don't ride to race. I race to ride harder and have more fun! I think a lot of use are like that.
LESSON 1: "You will always perform at your best when you remember 'why you ride' and honor that--everyday."
Well, like many years before--I have been sick the weeks leading up to the Classic. This year was no different as I suffered a sinus infection for the last week of September and beginning of October. Too add to that, I've been under a lot of stress (like we all have) and my training has been...well let's just say it hasn't been a lot.
MY RECENT TRAINING: I've actually only been on the bike 3-4 times a week and when I have been, I haven't really felt good--so I've accepted it and rode how I felt. No rides over 25 miles. A lot of Cyclo-IN 5' Training (only time I've had available) and lots of technique work from the CLUB's Climbing Camp. I always think that when I'm not feeling strong, is the PERFECT TIME to work on technique and core strength. (This thinking would pay off today) Other than that--I've pretty much felt like 'dead wood' leading up to the race. The difference is this year--I accepted it instead of trying to force it.
In years past I did a lot of prep work for Jamestown. A lot of focused efforts and trying to stay peaked for the event. I'd always come into the event with a lot of pressure on myself and a lot of expectations. This race course has always been a perfect venue for my style riding. Lots of power in the rollers, one good climb and a fast-powered finish.
I always expected to win--but never intended it. Until this day.
LESSON 2: "Your intentions are what make you strong--expectations make you weak."
So how did I feel this year in the final weeks leading up to the event? What were my expectations??
This year, I have to be honest. I just didn't give a shit. Sorry for my language, but that's how I felt. I just simply didn't care how I was going to do. I was on a ride with Big Tim on Sunday and we discussed the thought of showing up and not wearing my team kit. "Be invisible he said."
I just didn't feel like being recognized. Not that I didn't want to meet members or customers or friends. I just wanted to "be" in the moment. Plus, when you're not feeling very strong or confident--lots of us try to hide. Myself included.
Probably why I kept my approach on the down low this year as opposed to years before. I wanted to simply ride for me and me only. Not Graeme Street, owner for Cyclo-CLUB. I love what I do, but sometimes I just want to be that 10 year old kid again that loves the thrill of the ride--not having to be a public figure for failure or success.
To be honest. I almost didn't even go. I decided the night before that I'd go and focus on getting over to Newport for some fun with my family after the race and enjoy the day--no matter what the outcome. I decided to not care and just ride with the flow and see what happens.
I told Big Tim, "I don't have much in me. I have only ONE EFFORT I can give. If I come in dead last, I simply don't care as long as I use that ONE EFFORT."
Big Tim just said, "Go with the flow and expect nothing--you may surprise yourself."
I shook my head at him and said, "Tim, you know that's not my personality."
He said, "do it anyway."
LESSON 3: "Repeating the same process over and over again will only produce the same outcome. Something must change from within YOU."
With that in mind, I decided to be "OPPOSITE GRAEME" (like the opposite 'George Costanza' method from Seinfeld) and take some risks and NOT ride at the front for the race like I normally do. Yah, usually I'm the dick at the front sprinting away and show boating my fitness. Yah, no applause necessary. We're all very impressed;)
The lowly CAT 5's (me) only get one lap now, about 19.5 miles now (bummer) so no real opportunity for breaks. So, I decided to take a chance and hang in the back and simply OBSERVE. (Again--for those of you that know me....NOT my personality.)
Sandbagging? Maybe. But I can tell you this--When you KNOW a race can be won by playing conservative and you only have one effort available you can give and you know it--SANDBAG!
Anyone else that has done this race will tell you the same thing. It was funny to be in the back and watch how much effort people would put into things that required far less. I had learned again and again, "that working hard at the front almost guarantees you a loss."
To be honest, I knew I didn't have the fitness to ride at the front and butt heads anyway. I was honoring my body and what would be, would be. If there was a break, I would not go. I was fine with that. In fact, for the majority of the race--I simply had NO THOUGHTS of anything. Kinda nice actually.
LESSON 4: "Always ride within yourself--even if it means riding slower or the opposite of what you always do."
OK...now to the final four miles when the race really begins:
As we headed for the lighthouse to whip around and make the turn back to town for the finish I realized I was in LAST PLACE in the field. Dead last. Exactly where I wanted to be. But wow, that was NOT ME. Or at least who I thought I was. Again, still no thoughts in my head of winning. No thoughts at all. Just ride the bike and LET GO!
If you've done the Jamestown race you know that it's a race around the island and the last 4 miles are where the race is won or lost. If there are no breaks, then it all comes down to position, and who has the best power for the finish. Or better yet--who has burned the LEAST amount of matches. I had burned ZERO matches as I knew I only had only one available and I had to time it EXACTLY RIGHT.
LESSON 5: "He who burns the most matches is LEAST LIKELY to win."
The only advantage I had was that I knew the course well. I knew the turns, winds, and opportunities to move forward. I knew the finish and I knew where to be. I had actually envisioned in my head EXACTLY how I could get into position to win. I knew that if I could get to the top of Hamilton Hill (the big hill near the finish) in 5th to 6th wheel with energy left (a match to burn) I had a fighting chance.
LESSON 6: "Knowledge is power--And use of that knowledge is the answer."
As we rounded the light house, pace picked up big time from 22 to 26+ with everyone fighting for position. Everyone always thinks that the first up Hamilton will win the race--but I have learned the hard way that the secret is to NOT be at the very front up the hill.
I began to eye scan the field and MARK MY MAN well before we got to the base of the hill. I saw a rider that was with me towards the back. He had been there the whole time. Nothing special about him particularly, BUT the snap is his legs looked good. Confident.
THAT WAS MY MAN! I knew it. I envisioned him scaling up Hamilton with control and position in mind and that was the wheel I was going to follow. No matter what.
As we got to about 1.5 miles out and closer to the base of Hamilton everyone gets tense and looking to move forward. That's when the accidents happen--every year.
Just as our group is fighting for position, the other cat 5 groups are passing us on the left as they head for the lighthouse turnaround and everyone gets distracted for a split second. THIS YEAR WAS NO DIFFERENT!
Sure enough as the group flew past going to the lighthouse, pace dropped significantly and everyone put on their brakes (grim death for racers) and lost focus for one second and sure enough there was a touch of wheels and I felt a rider behind me begin to slide out and sure enough smacked down and took three or four other riders with him. OUCH!!!!
LESSON 7: "Never, ever take your eyes off the pack you are in. NEVER."
Yah, it sucks! Nothing gives me greater displeasure than to see another rider go down. Nothing. But...that is racing. Especially in CAT 5 when a lot of us are not racers or use to a group with riders to the left and right. Crashes are inevitable. Probably why I don't race a lot.
Once we came back into focus, I was still at the back and knew I had to move up. I knew as we came across the causeway to the base of Hamilton that there was an inside track to make up over 3/4 of the filed or more. I had done it before.
It's risky as the winds are working into you and the room on the inside is gravel and debris, but if you can hold the inside line with the gravel you can do it. SO I DID.
Boom--10th position or so after that move. Still no matches burned. No effort at all really, just knowledge combined with opportunity. I was exactly where I envisioned being going into the base of the hill.
A rider sprinted off the front trying to get to the base of Hamilton first. "DON'T PANIC I THOUGHT". Every year people try to do that and rarely do they succeed. I didn't move. Just watched.
Then, the TRICK. Picking the right gearing for Hamilton BEFORE you make the turn. You can go up in the BIG RING which I have before, BUT it saps a lot of strength that you'll need for the run in. Remember, I only have ONE MATCH TO BURN--so patience is key. SO, I opted this year to drop to the small ring and SUPERSPIN up the hill at about (120 RPM).
The risk...DROPPING THE CHAIN! Yah, this is what happened last year if you remember. I got into the small ring and then flipped to the big ring at the top and there goes the chain and the race. (There were other problems and mistakes--but that one hurt;)
Sure enough as my vision had predicted, my MARKED MAN in white came around and positioned in front of me on the hill. Serendipity? Maybe. But there he was, my lead up the hill and I focused ONLY on his wheel. I was already solid in the small ring and my cadence was HIGH!
Lots of riders passed me. Maybe four or five. But just as I had predicted, my man was a good climber and swiveled around them and I followed.
In my head--"DON'T PANIC. Relax and breathe. Be patient. TRUST!"
As we crested the top of the hill, guess where I was?
Yup, 6th wheel with my MARKED MAN about two wheels in front and some familiar riders from the front of the pack from earlier in the race.
I was right where "I INTENDED TO BE." Like a dream unfolding in front of me.
LESSON 8: "You must intend what you desire before it can come true."
It's about 500 meters or so from the crest of Hamilton to the sharp left hairpin turn for the final run in to the line. A very tricky and dangerous turn that has yielded countless accidents and crashes over the years for the Classic.
As we got to about 100 meters to the turn, I felt STRONG! I thought, "You have what you intended, now execute your vision. Be partient and wait for your moment!"
You know what? I DIDN'T HONOR THAT!!
For the only time that day, I broke my train of thought and the OLD ME with the OLD INTENTIONS came out for a split second as I wound up into a sprint to make it to the turn first. I broke my intentions and I can guarantee if what happened next did not unfold, I would have lost.
LESSON 9: "Have faith in your intentions--they will never fail you."
Then, wouldn't you know it, just as I was making my mistake, my MARKED MAN sweeped out in front of me not knowing I was coming on strong and pulled right in front of my wheel.
PERFECT! It was like I had intended it without my knowing. AMAZING. I could see it in my head and I KNEW at that moment I would win the race at the line. I KNEW IT. (Thank you MARKED MAN--I honor you.)
He sprinted for the turn and cut wide and I followed. You lose a lot of speed going into that turn and then have to go into full acceleration to get back into position. Lots of ground can be made up during that time.
As I reacquired his wheel he went into full sprint. I mean FULL SPRINT. I remained patient and used him as a lead-out.
Just as I was looking for where to make my move, the road takes a SHARP, BLIND S-bend from right to left and you have to decide how to cut the turn. Wide or sharp??
Every year, I go wide. It's tough to cut the turn and hold a line at 40+mph and again--LOTS OF ACCIDENTS on the final lead in. Plus, cutting sharp to the inside crosses you over the yellow line and breaks the rules.
BUT---REMEMBER LESSON 6??
"Knowledge is power and using that knowledge is the answer!"
At the beginning of the race, someone in my group asked the official, "when we're coming in for the finish can we use the entire road?"
The official said, "Yes. Only on the downhill after Hamilton and to the finish can you BREAK THE YELLOW LINE RULE!"
I distinctly remembered that as I was on my MARKED MAN'S WHEEL.
"Graeme, you can cut hard to the inside. You can HOLD THE LINE!"
So as he kept sprinting and made a semi-wide turn to the outside, I bombed myself to the inside of the turn as tight as I could cut it. I mean TIGHT!
Now, I want to tell you--I am not a great with high speed cornering. I carry a lot of upper body weight (my mom says I'm big boned) and it's tough for me to not overturn with a lot of speed and come into the turn 'hot'and out of control.
HOWEVER...I had a new weapon this year that has changed how I ride and allowed me to tap into more power I have developed. My Cervelo R3. The bike that just assisted me getting up Mt. Washington 4 minutes faster and now I needed it to cut the impossible turn.
For those of you that remember my review of this R3 machine (my white angel), I told you that it could cut corners better than any other bike I had ever been on. I had battle tested it on Joshuatown Road with similar break-neck turns and been able to hold the line--KNOWLEDGE IS POWER.
Now, it was time to put that to the test with my authentic intentions.
I cut sharp, I mean really sharp and DID NOT let up or lose speed.
BOOM!!!!--I had position on my MARKED MAN and he was out of my view finder.
"I got it!" I thought to myself.
NOPE!
Just as my head thought I had won with about 100 meters to go out came the tip of a wheel into my right periphery--AND HE WAS MOVING!!
I lost position and moved into second place and that was it. I had lost and come up short again.
OR HAD I?
The rider in question had been another MARKED MAN from earlier in the race that was wearing a black 'DOPERS SUCK!" Jersey. (Love it!!)
I had seen him at the front for a lot of the race. Quality rider and smart. I had raced against him before. BUT, I had noticed earlier that he had burned a lot of matches playing at the front.
REMEMBER LESSON 5?
"He who burns the most matches is LEAST LIKELY to win."
Now Graeme! NOW!!!!! Burn the match and make your intentions come true!
"I saw the field. I saw the exact route that would take me to the fiish and I let go."
I gave above full effort and used what I have developed with my core training and techniques----POWER & SPEED ON DEMAND!!!!!!!!!!!
I may not be the best endurance rider, but when speed is needed, I can deliver in short bursts and use my best weapon I have developed over the years with Cyclo-CORE--My Cottage of Wattage!
It was time to UNLEASH THIS POWER in one authentic effort.
"Dopers Suck" had at least a bike length on me with less than 25 meters and I gave it all the gas I had. A years worth of training and strength all focused into a "sharp blade of focused energy."
We swerved closer together as the line approached. He had me in position. He had the win.
BUT, little did he know that I had "intended the win" within that millisecond. I was what I believed I could be in that moment. I had seen myself cross the line first. I had seen my wheel move forward in front of his, even before it happened. I KNEW I HAD WON before I caught him.
At the line, I made a final throw. A final gesture of honoring my body and delivering what I had. Nothing left on the table. No regrets. No apologies.
I crossed the line at 42+ mph according to my computer.
A SCREAM SHOUTED OUT OF ME FROM THE DEPTHS......"Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"
I could hear my beautiful wife shouting louder than I was from the crowd....
"Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh! You did it baby! You did it!"
I felt the WARRIOR in me for the first time in months. I felt my authentic self. I was, in that moment, the person I am always trying to be. The person that I had to 'let go' to find.
I HAD RELEASED.
My endorphins popped harder than they had since I was 10 years old as I made jumps for the line in my imaginary races against the pelaton.
I was a kid again!! In that moment, I remembered 'why I ride!' I experienced the thrill.
I heard the "DOPERS SUCK" rider that I had just nudged out of first shout out...."You suck!" (How apropos;)
Now, I don't take it personal. I do suck. For I am certain he had intended the win as well and my intentions took that away.
BUT, on this day at that moment--I HAD LET GO AND HONORED MYSELF.
I had let go of who I was. I had let go of what I expected. I had let go of what people thought of me. I was no longer Graeme Street, I was just Graeme on a bike.
I made that push for me. I made it from my core self.
It felt good!!! Peaceful. And amazingly, I look back at it now and it felt effortless. There was no pain at the line. There was no pain in the patience. There was only discovery.
I proceeded up the road to enjoy the moment and cool-down. I was greeted by my MARKED MAN in white and he told me, "I went too early and lead you in, didn't I?"
I told him, "I know. I intended you to. Thank you." I am grateful for you MARKED MAN in white.
NO, I am not a racer. I am not genetically gifted for the sport. BUT, I have learned something that I hope we can all grow from...
LESSON 10: "Even when all things around you seem to be working against you and life is boggin you down--you can always LET GO of your fears and inhibitions and exert one authentic effort and get back in the game!"